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Last night I went to see Paramore (for the second time ever) and Fall Out Boy (for the first time ever) in Atlanta. It was at the same Amphitheatre that Warped Tour stops at every year, which to me made it feel like home, a place of comfort. I had been there so many years before, in fact it was where I caught my very first Paramore show in ‘07. But while I stood there, much older and out of my teens, I felt like I was sudden remembering my way home after feeling lost for a very long time. The part of myself that was so passionate resurfaced and I felt like I had some direction and ambition again. Being that I’m graduating from college in November I’ve been feeling extremely anxious about what I plan on doing with my life and it was like a face palm moment - DUH - the whole reason I got into graphic design was through making fan art in high school and designing websites for other fans. Band posters, collages, banners.
I lost my way, but last night as I stood in front of two key bands of my mental development (haha) it all fell into place. It was overwhelming. The emotions filled me up and spilled over as I sang every word and this time I wasn’t too shy to dance. That was the part of growing up that finally didn’t suck, I could enjoy myself and not feel so awkward because I know now that nobody is secretly watching me to judge - if someone is at that concert too and sees me dancing then maybe it will give then permission to dance too. But for me, it was finally feeling free and letting go of everything I’ve always held back.
I thought all of the bands that had saved my life before had given up, fallen out, or let go - but I realize now that all of the power they gave to me as a kid is what I needed to bring them back.
2005 to 2008 was such an amazing time for music. There was so much life. With the rest of the world going to hell, it’s about time to revive it.
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